Tag Archives: parenting

Have Your Kids Walked Away From God?

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 22 August, 2014 None comments

How many kids are leaving home after high school and walking away from their “faith?”

These questions are important but there is a harsh reality to these questions as well. We all long for our families to be all out for God, live a life for Christ, walk with Christ and to pursue Him with all that we are. There will come a time in every one of our lives when we are faced with the question: “What do I believe?”. The question poses a response of self reflection and self purpose. Do we feel we have a purpose worth living for in this life and if so, what does it entail? Secondly, what we have been taught, whether from faith or lack of faith, does that define who I am?

Thanks to behavioralhealthhub.com

We all have experienced on some level or another raising kids in a Christian home or being raised in one yourself. Or perhaps you have nothing to do with God and have simply watched a close friend partake in either scenario. In either case, we all have a picture of what it looks like whether good or bad. The problem with a “church going family” is that our lives often do not reflect the work of God. We can do all the right things and say all the right things but are your actions living proof of what you say you believe?

Are kids attending youth group because it’s fun and exciting or because they are becoming equipped with the Word of the Lord? Are we shipping our kids off to church camp in hopes to straighten them out? Are we going to church because we long to hear the Lord’s teaching and be in community with those around us, or do we go in hopes that someone else hears the message without applying the message to ourselves. Or–maybe we attend church because we believe it is the right thing to do but what teaching do we carry with us throughout the week?

Ephesians 4: 11-12 “So Christ himself gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the pastors and teachers, to equip his people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up.”

Here’s my personal opinion. Although I am not a psychologist, having experienced life and working with kids on many different levels, I’ve come to realize there are two extremely challenging times in a persons life. These two events in a child’s life will begin to define who they are based off how they respond and what they choose to partake in, but we as the parents have the responsibility to properly equip them.

The first defining moment; middle school. We all know middle school is the dreaded age any man, woman, or child would long to run away from. Puberty, squeaky voices, tall girls, short boys, pimples, acceptance, bullying, popularity, fashion, etc. These are all extremely weighty for a middle school child. These are the critical years of losing ones innocence and beginning to enter the stage of awareness. I do not mean losing innocence in a sexual connotation although that is the route our society travels (this is a whole different topic of discussion). I mean innocence in the realm of simply an innocent child becoming aware of their surroundings and beginning to enter adulthood. For example, what used to be an exciting time to kiss mommy and daddy is now a humiliating event. Boys caring about their hairstyle, girls wanting to wear makeup. Kids begging for a cellphone, email account and connecting on social media, the list goes on. Things that once were not of importance in your family now takes the lead of every dinner conversation. The continuation of innocence long to stay forever with our children, must flee at some point or another due to the fall of man. They will and are growing up. They will begin to experience pain in this life that you as their parent can no longer protect them from. The sadness sets in as your child experiences their first real heartache in this life. The awareness has officially set in and children begin to lose their sense of innocence.

Secondly, college brings about a trying time in a young adults life as well. Leaving home at the ripe age of 18 is like sending your 2 year old off to church camp. They are entirely too young and uneducated on how to survive in this world on their own. They are still babies. Take a look around at church and pick out the 17 year old standing two rows in front of you. They will be graduating next year. Do they look old enough? Do they have a handle on life and how to survive in this big world we call society? Are they capable of handling finances and living alone? It’s a pressure cooker out there. Expectations are high and money does not fall from the sky. Our kids take off from home with some “idea” of what life is all about but hold very little “real” knowledge on what to expect. Are they equipped?

Thanks to
abpworldgroup.com

This is a scary reality but more scary is our children drowning in our society. Their lost souls seeking acceptance from anyone and anything. We can teach your kids all we want and give them all the knowledge in the world, but they will have to choose what they believe themselves when push comes to shove. Sorority houses, parties, drugs, alcohol, sex, relationships worth investing in– the list goes on. I’m sure all of us have those stories that come from our college days and with hindsight would change many events. Our troubled years tend to be figuring out who we are and what we believe about this world. What is our survival mechanism. Sometimes we pull out of the haze and other times we are stuck in those years for a long time, simply lost.

Our kids need solid teaching, solid family foundation and solid biblical teaching. Our churches need to equip our students to learn how to walk the life of Christ; they need guidance not entertainment. They need tough love and acceptance. They need a safe haven and open communication. These kids need to know how to survive in this world without living at home. They need protection but Truth. They need love. They need guidance along with experience. They need Christ as the focal point of their being. We need to stop sugar coating life and equip these children.

It all starts in the home. We can pray that our churches provide great the accountability for our children but it begins and ends in our home. Life is not easy, but Christ will and has overcome this world. We need to stop with the mediocrity and be outright for Christ and Him alone. Children need to see us live out Christ in our home, families and relationships. They need to see us actively living the Narrow path rather than speak on it. They follow our example not our words.

I found this article and was actually quite amused by it. Not because I think it’s poorly written but because I think it gets back to the basics. (Read here)

Moment of Truth: Lets get back to the basics. Equip our children. Pray for our children and their tender hearts to be malleable for Christ’s teaching and guiding. Let’s live out the powerful teaching God has impressed on our hearts. Live a life that is extraordinary, not following the path of this ordinary life. Be an example to your children.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go,
And when he is old he will not depart from it.

Little Man Workouts

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 15 June, 2014 None comments

Oh how my son never ceases to amaze me. His sweet little personality in every step throughout the day is a constant reminder of thankfulness.

I believe Cooper has officially put himself in charge of daddy’s workouts and I believe that Cooper would make the best trainer out there.

He decided he wanted to work out with daddy and do his ab workout. His tiny little body lay next to daddy while he copies everything daddy does from P90X ab ripper x.

“Look Daddy, I can do them too!”

“Get to work daddy” as Cooper has happily put himself in charge of daddy’s workouts and keeps him going. He continues to ask for “one more” every time Michael stops to take a break. “One more” pull-up, “one more” sit up. Keep going daddy, it’s fun to watch! :)

Sweet baby was so proud of himself. I can’t believe this little guy is going to be 2 next Saturday the 21st. :( It’s been really hard on me as I am so happy he’s growing and developing his cute little personality, but I am also so sad the baby stage is officially gone.

5 Minutes Inside a Mom’s Head…

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 13 June, 2014 None comments

What does five minutes inside a mom’s head really look like? I saw this article and laughed to myself while crying over the harsh reality that it is beyond true in every mom’s life.

The comforting thing is we all know what one another is going through while men sit on the sidelines contemplating the next win in basketball or whose going to get drafted to which team.

Some people may think 5 minutes is nothing but a long relaxed deep breath. These five minutes are anything and everything but a deep breath. More like gasping for air, panting as if you just ran a marathon or simply drowning and still making your mental checklist.

I saw this article and it was a must share. Any and all of you who have children will relate to this article while every man reading this may think we’ve lost our minds and have our “job” so easy. “Easy?” You want to talk about easy? My life is everything but easy. Yes I may stay home with the kids and not get up at 6 and get to work by 8, work all day to have an hour lunch to enjoy the sun, take a walk or even go out to eat with the dudes to only get home at 6 pm. Dinners made for you and your kids bathed and ready for bed. “Yes, I stay home with the kids, yes MY job is easy!”

Sometimes I want to yell this to every man out there who complains about there regimen of working to support the family. I 100% appreciate and support any man who is willing to care for their family so the wife can take the opportunity to hold the house together and raise the children with good morals and standards while keeping them in a family environment rather then childcare. I also appreciate the simple fact that my husband can earn triple if not quadruple the income I could earn in a given year. Yes, I support you and greatly appreciate you and all the hard work it takes in our society these days to have a one income family! Thank you!

On the other hand, learn to appreciate your wife. Appreciate your child learning manners, learning their alphabet, getting socialized on play dates, having educational toys and activities to participate in. Appreciate that your child and wife are probably happy when you reach home at the end of the day. Appreciate that you probably don’t partake in most the household chores, errands, grocery shopping, laundry and bills that’s been taken care of for you! Appreciate that when an outburst happens at home, your wife probably knows how to handle the situation and guide you through it!

This may make you laugh at the harsh reality of it, but lets be honest, a man wants respect and appreciation so badly. This is what makes a man a man. We all long for respect and appreciation as well. We may long to receive it in different ways than our spouse but oh how true it is to feel that respect for what you do on a daily basis. Both men and women need to bot give respect and receive respect. We work our jobs because that’s the job we’ve been given at that point in time and we need to be thankful and appreciative of one another. Households are no easy to run and we all know earning an income to support a family is a challenge in and of itself. No need to put one another down and compare our job tasks, simply appreciate them and love them for what they do!

For a little humor read this article: 5 Minutes inside a moms head

Thanks to: huffingtonpost.com

Moment of Truth: Multi-tasking is the essence of a mother’s life. Learning how to manage her family to get everyone where they need to be, projects done, bills paid and fresh clothes to wear is the essence of a mother who cares. All you mom’s out there, you do a great job even though it is often a thankless job! Keep it up!

Sometime I wonder…

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 10 June, 2014 None comments

Sometimes I wonder why I wake up in the morning and continue on the day of disastrous events. I end the day in a state of oblivion laughing at the messes that continue to come my way.

I find the only way to make it through crazy chaotic kid days, is to laugh at what takes place rather then get too uptight about it. Kids are kids and are innocent little people trying to make it through their own day in a big world being told “no” all the time.

I find it’s easier to laugh at the crazy responses rather then get upset as if they are an adult choosing to be ignorant. :)

My sweetie laying in the pile of clean clothes.

I wake up this morning to an early start with kids being here around 7:30.

Take Haylee to Preschool- out of gas and running late.

Leave gas station and ALL 16 oz of my coffee spill on the entire backseat floor.

Get to preschool in the nick of time.

Clean up coffee disaster

Spend time with a girlfriend while the boys play (relaxing)

Pick up kids- I have a tummy bug that persists all day long.

We have an accident in two of the kids pants while at the park.

Kids play in the sandbox and little Ian decides to chomp on seashells.

Kids leave for the day- make dinner and my husbands doesn’t eat due to not feeling good.

Husband came home with migrane

Cooper is crying, he wants his footie pajamas on and I put his foot-less pajamas on as it’s very hot in our house.

My husband and I cave in to our little son wanting footie pj’s and a muffin. We laugh to ourselves in utter oblivion of what this night consists of.

Nights not over– Cooper goes to bed late, I rush to the store for my prescription.

8:57- pharmacy closes at 9, I walk in the door with NO perscription.

8:58- Pharmacy calls, they found my prescription laying on the ground.

9 pm- try and dish up some granola for a snack, spill it everywhere. (Husband chuckles)

I begin to tell my husband this is how my ENTIRE day has gone while I accidentally puncture the container the granola is in, spilling the remainder amongst the rest.

Stare at the pile of clean clothes covering the floor while I wish my prescription was in hand, pj’s on, face washed and clothes were folded.

I refuse to fold the clothes tonight and will begin my day again tomorrow around 7.

Husband needs something printed and scanned. We both spend 30 minutes trying to figure out why the printer will not print the current document but prints 5 different items from three months ago.

Paper jam- try again.

Paper jam- finally we get duplicates of the item and we send it off.

10 pm- in bed

Moment of Truth: Some days you simply can’t wish them away and must laugh at the stupidity you discovered each hour. How are your days similar?

My Poor Baby!

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 6 June, 2014 None comments

My poor baby has been everything but healthy since he was born. He has continually been sick and I can’t seem to understand why. In and out of the Children’s hospital, doctors office and canceling many appointments to avoid the “hustle and bustle” of life to help get him back on track.

Here we are today and he has had a temperature ranging from 100.2-104 for the last four days. He starts off the day really cool and as the day progresses, he’s burning up. The next day, he starts off really hot and throughout the day it goes up and down but never away. The doctors office had me bring him in today to check him out. Two and half hours later, no cough, no cold, no ear infections, no nothing!!! How frustrating it is to sit there for 2 1/2 hours for what seems to be nothing except a high possibility of contracting some other sickness.

This time the trauma came from strapping a bag on his private parts to catch any output of urine. The little man hasn’t been drinking or eating so I have had to force fluids yet again. It took 2 hours for any output to come our way and finally my sweet baby was able to tell me when he did. I was so proud of him. We made a big deal about it as he was so scared about this foreign bag strapped to him; hoping this begins an exciting phase of potty training once he begins to feel better.

They tested his urine and all came back good. They have no area to pinpoint why he has such high fevers other than he simple is that child who gets sick all the time. My natural reaction as a mom is to assume something bigger is taking place that they haven’t yet caught. Two trips to the children’s hospital, many doctor visits and continual sicknesses make me a bit curious. They reassured me yet again today that it must be a viral infection. Hoping this is true but annoyed I keep visiting the doctors for no reason but to waste my sick child’s time.

The doctor did reassure me that at some point in a child’s life they will experience sickness on a very frequent basis, whether the first three years of their life or once they reach kindergarten. That comforted me slightly.

So….our fourth day of fevers is almost over. They advised me to push through tomorrow forcing fluids. If by Saturday or Sunday, the fever still persists than we must return for more testings. Praying for him to wake up with no fever and an appetite is all I can hope for right now. After no sleep last night and dealing with an unhappy child, I am ready for some good times to come!

Moment of Truth: The healthy times with your child often make you forget how blessed you are to truly have a healthy baby. Sickness and disease is running rampant throughout the world and the healthy little ones need to be embraced and we as parents need to be thankful. Our prayers need to go towards the sick babies and families that are suffering emotionally, physically, mentally and financially. Our family has only begun to taste what this really looks like and I pray we don’t continue down this road with frequent hospitalizations.

Thought of the Day

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 23 May, 2014 None comments

My son as every parent says, does nothing wrong. :) Okay that isn’t where I am going with this, but my son does not hit his friends and does not show aggression in a physical manner. But for some reason the other day he decided to partake in this action. The children I am watching stay from about 8 am to 5-5:30 pm. While their mom was at our house to pick the kids up Cooper decided to get upset and take a big whack to the little boys head and let out a large scream. Sharing has been a very tough thing to learn lately. He has done a fabulous job considering he does this three full days a week. When this incident took place I was mortified! I did not want his mom to think this happens all day long while she is at work because it doesn’t. Cooper does not hit…….. until now.

Two days ago the same occurrence proceeded to happen before my very eyes. Same situation, mom had just walked in the door and was chit-chatting and all of a sudden, the toy helicopter landed abruptly upon this little boys head. I was mortified yet again. I couldn’t fathom what had just happened and let alone while his mom was here for the second time. Again, this does NOT happen all day long but how do you explain this while she has visually seen this take place two times now?!

As the night proceeded I began to contemplate the scenario. I’ve begin to believe that by the end of the day Cooper is simply done sharing his toys and is ready for them to leave. He has to share all day long and is constantly being nagged by me to share his toys. He’s young, doesn’t have siblings and for the first time has regular friends here playing with HIS toys. I think this could be our culprit; he just wants his toys back. It’s the end of the day, friends are leaving and hungry bellies and tired eyes begin to take place. Poor little guy!

Moment of Truth: I’m glad Cooper does not hit on a regular basis but WHY does it have to occur when his mom is around!? The ugly moments you wish no one saw making you feel like a poor parent. “He is really a good kid” you think to yourself wishing that that was the side she saw as well.

Timeliness

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 4 May, 2014 None comments

Timeliness is everywhere in life. We try and get to work on time, church, bible study, kids sporting activities, dinner dates, play dates, piano recitals, so on and so forth. Everything revolves around time. I’ve come to realize as I have just passed my second anniversary and am coming up on my sons 2nd birthday that life does not slow down. Do I want to be controlled by time or do I want to control the time I have?

How do we feel accomplished in our day? Do we lay our heads on our pillow at night feeling we didn’t quite get everything done that we had hoped or anticipated we would? What was on your list that you wish you could have accomplished? Was it worthwhile? Was it beneficial to your family and your soul, or was is an activity that we make important in our households that may not necessarily be that important?

These are questions that have filled my mind as of recent since the whirlwind began a month ago. The chaos of my day as of recent has been filled with three tiny souls longing to be loved and taught to love. The important things such as making my bed in the morning has taken a backseat. Washing every dish in the sink and vacuuming the floor has become less than an hourly or daily chore. My cleanliness obsession has begun to take a reality check as chasing three kids around doesn’t accomplish this task. Picking what really matters on a daily basis has become the new normal for me. Realizing it’s almost impossible to get anywhere early but roughly right on time or 5 minutes late; I’ve got this down to a science.

Realizing my life has taken a turn of utter chaos not all good and not all bad, has brought to my attention as I can’t believe this year has already brought us to the 5th month of 2014. I feel like we just got through the holidays and found out my mother-in-law was sick. Here we are in May and my son is almost 2 years old. Wondering where the time went and where it continues to still go baffles me beyond belief. The only thing I can stop and do is be thankful for the day I am in. This hasn’t been an easy concept for me, but the older I get, the longer I am married, and the older my son gets makes me realize time only goes faster, not slower. I want to relish in the day I am currently in and find the blessings in the tough days I wish I could sleep away.

As my son reaches his second birthday and we just passed our second anniversary I can humbly say, I’ve learned a lot in 2 full years. This is no understatement. Those of you who know me, know the struggles our family has faced and have been there to love and care for us through the process. Knowing God is doing a mighty work is extremely encouraging even when the hardship seems to cloud the work God is doing. I heard it once said, “It takes failure to bring success!” This caught my attention and made me realize we would never grow if we didn’t face hard circumstances in life forcing uncomfortability. As much as I want the extraordinary life, it also requires trials to bring perseverance which brings about a deeper relationship with Christ. We can’t get there without learning along the way.

My goal is to bring glory to God and be a blessing to my family. I want the world to know there is a happiness and peace that comes from trials knowing God is holding my hand along the way. The world would like to keep us blind to real happiness and often they succeed. It’s easy to get caught up in the mundane of life and allow petty things to dictate our accomplishments of the day. I know there are many times I lay my head to rest running down my mental checklist of what I got done and need to do the following day. These are not important tasks. After losing my mother-in-law, being reminded that all of her accomplishments in her career were nothing that lasted. They fall away but her soul remains. Nothing in her life that was career driven, self driven or for worldly pleasure went with her when she passed. The moment she took her last breath at 60 years old, none of that was important. Her soul, heart and mind is ALL that mattered.

Moment of Truth: What are you striving for in life? Is it worthwhile? Will it last for eternity or is it temporary? Strive to be more than this world has to offer.

3 Little Munchkins

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 26 April, 2014 None comments

I returned home late Monday night to be awakened with a reality I wasn’t ready for. My son woke up really early allowing for a cranky attitude for not getting as much sleep and also to pay my back from being gone for so long. I also had to bid my parents ado for coming and staying with Cooper and than taking off to begin their journey home. I proceeded to grocery shop and then have two little munchkins arrive at our house at 11:30. Yes, this all took place before 11:30 in the morning. Mind you, I got home and in bed at 11:30 the previous night. Our vacation ended abruptly bringing a reality check the following morning that once you leave your destination vacation, your vacation has officially vanished into thin air leaving you with nothing but a distant memory.

I have agreed to watch two additional little munchkins for a gal who needs some help for a few months. The blessing is I am watching them within our dwelling which is helpful for Cooper especially since we just returned home and all of a sudden have a houseful. These two little munchkins are 2 years and 4 years old leaving me with 2 two years old and a 4 year old. Two boys and one girl. It is very time consuming, not that I didn’t know this already having my own, but three kids is a lot. I am excited to have playmates for Cooper, but I didn’t realize how tiring it was until I decided that 8:30 last night I was ready for bed.

I’ve had a couple comments that this will help prepare more for having more children, but lets be honest, it’s entirely different watching someone else’s children than your own. I think every mom would agree to this comment as there is a different relationship built. Not good or bad, but different. Different boundaries are help with someone else’s kids rather than my own. I can discipline Cooper the way I see fit because he is my child. I don’t take the role as a caregiver. I still implement rules to keep the kids getting along and setting boundaries to help things flow more smoothly.

I think it’s a really good opportunity for all the kids to be around playmates and force them to learn it is okay to share toys. I’ve enjoyed the little girl as well, considering I do not get a lot of girl interaction and she is your typical girly girl. It’s fun to do crafts and hear princess stories while the boys thrash around and do what boys do; be destructive. :)

Needless to say, I am busy with three kids 3 days a week, Bible study and volunteering at my church along with working for Jamberry, holding the household together, cooking, cleaning, and keeping my stories coming for you all. I definitely am busy, no doubt about that! They are all good things but I am learning how to better manage the little time I have. How to cook lunch and dinner while kids are running around and also wanting to interact with them while picking up toys and trying to keep things clean.

This is the end of my cleaning…wishing I would have snapped a photo of the beginning state!

Yesterday started off a bit challenging. Kids came over, Cooper had a very nasty diaper that needed immediate attention. Realizing it was beyond my diaper skills, I went to start the bath. Returning to get the little munchkin realizing there is a trail behind him from one end of the house to the other. He managed to rip his diaper open and all the gel within the diaper was spread like cotton all throughout the house. If any of you have had experience with the inside gel of a diaper, you know it is IMPOSSIBLE to clean up. No vacuum, broom or mop could take care of this mess. It was amazing to me how impossible this gel really is. It took me forever to try and get the entire mess cleaned up while Cooper kept losing his balance and would slip like a deer on ice trying to walk to me on the wet floor. The frustration arose in both of us as I couldn’t clean it up fast enough and he was so frustrated why he couldn’t walk across the floor as usual.

Sweet baby so happy to have his Lil Coupe for the Coop oblivious to what had just taken place.

I have a new appreciation for diapers and the way the gel works to hold everything in there for hours, but I also have a huge hatred in my heart for the gel when it escapes the diaper leaving my wood floors an utter disaster.

Moment of Truth: Sometimes life is unmanageable and seems out of control! It happens, we all have those days that seem to begin imperfectly, yet they can get better. A new day comes, or the moment passes leaving those memories to be laughable. Kids bring about crazy experiences yet I wouldn’t’ change it for anything. I still love my munchkin even though he has no clue what I do to clean up after him while his day consists only of play and sleep. Oh the glorious innocence of little minds!

Mama Made a Boo-Boo

Posted by Delightfully Doable on 30 March, 2014 None comments

Boo-Boo time came last night and not only was it sad, but it was mother inflicted! :(

I was putting his jammies on and my thumb made quite the mark on his sweet little chin. It bled a bit but is holding up well. He’s a tough man!

Sometimes I wish he would cry longer as its okay to be hurt and cry. He’s so quick to recover from his little injuries, often I don’t know he hurt himself till I find bruises on his little legs during bath time. He’s so tough he barely makes a peep! Poor child!

Sweet baby!